Showing posts with label Neal Abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Neal Abuse. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 13, 2018

Wednesday Review: Happy Birthday, Honey. Have Some Flowers

I am not known for my green thumb. I have killed at least 3 pots of basil every year since Neal and I got married. And my best friend finally convinced me to trash the crispy orchid I had forgotten about in the guest room. I've managed to keep one shoot of bamboo from IKEA alive through 2 moves, but I don't know that it's living its best life under my care. I love to look at flowers and, someday, I hope to learn how to keep them alive for more than 3 weeks. Until then, there's the Philadelphia Flower Show.

One of Blue's preschool teachers offered us tickets last year but it always falls around Neal's birthday and by that point, we already had plans. But I had made myself a note so when it rolled around this year, I was ready. Unfortunately, it fell directly on Neal's 50th birthday this year. And if there's one thing he hates more than war, it's crowds of people in a convention hall. So, naturally I bought our tickets and then asked him to "run" into Reading Market Terminal for cheesesteaks afterward. He came back out, cheesesteaks in hands...45 minutes later. Clearly I owe him a do-over for this birthday that involves a deserted brewery in the middle of a Monday and a matinee showing of some historical fiction flick. But we both agreed...this was not your average flower show.

Once you get over the sticker shock of $35/person (with other "experiences" like the butterfly exhibit and preview days costing extra), plus parking in Chinatown, it is easier to appreciate the scale of work that goes into a production of this magnitude. Just the entrance alone felt like being dropped in the middle of the Amazon, complete with bird call sound effects.
The theme this year was Wonders of Water and while some exhibits simply used water to keep the flowers alive in their vases, some of them incorporated full-on waterfalls. But my favorite was this example of reusing rainwater for the garden.
Even the front of this landscape was breathtaking. Not only did the designers work with the theme, but they paid more attention to color than many other exhibitors.
If this was in my backyard, I would probably never leave the house.

One of my other favorites was the interior/exterior display. One side of the partition featured interior rooms (like a study or an office) decorated with plants and flowers. On the opposite side was a series of stoops, much like what you see in the Philadelphia area, landscaped by various groups. One was designed by the Orchid Society while the porch "next door" was constructed by a collection of high school students.

The Orchid Society took a more minimalist approach, but everyone around us stopped to admire the fish-shaped rain chain next to the door. What an unexpected way to move rainwater from the roof to the ground!

The Philadelphia Convention Center is massive and not only did they fit a full-size shipwreck in there
but also multiple landscaped gardens and courtyards,

a life-sized elephant decked out in moss and umbrellas,


several dedicated spaces for individual competitions (like this "fairy garden" area)

and an entire art gallery with works created using pressed flowers and plants.
By this point, we had gotten our $35 worth. On the other side of the convention hall, vendors from all over the country were selling everything from seeds to entire outdoor spaces. We did some window shopping and made some notes for handcrafted goods we want to buy in a few years when we come back and settle down. Just this past year alone I've already added an incredibly fragile piece of art that is about 20 layers of fused glass, plus a vintage clear hobnail punch bowl and platter - all of which will be hand carried 2600 miles to California. (That doesn't include my Derby mint julep glass collection, the hand-painted portrait from our wedding day done by a Kuwaiti artist in 2008 and everything from Blue's birth that is, literally, priceless.) So this exquisite blue heron bell from Old Town Wind Bells?
Will have to wait a few years. But we'll be back for you, my pretty.

At the exit of the flower show was a photo op
(clearly this was non-negotiable as it was a chance for me to finally be the fragile flower I've always felt I was AND it was sponsored by the AARP on Neal's 50th birthday) and...
a place to purchase that Hobbit Hole we've had our eye on. I'm not sure this could ever be more than a place to take a nap in the sun but if we had a few acres of land in the woods, I would just hand over my credit card, no questions asked. I feel like I could write the next great American novel in a place like a hobbit hole. That's obviously the only thing holding me back.

I'm not sure I would make the Philly Flower Show an annual affair, unless I was unconstrained by time or school bus schedule. Their target market, the AARP crowd, had the entire day to stroll down the aisles, stopping often to chat about what they liked, didn't like and would completely re-design. It is not a place that is easily navigable if you need to be in and out in 120 minutes. But we hit the highlights and I'm glad we went. It certainly gave me a new appreciation for the many ways people view flowers and how they should be displayed most creatively. And when we came out, we walked right into Chinatown, which tempted us with its smells and its sale on strawberries. 2 for $1.00 in March? Who has ever heard of such a thing?








Friday, March 19, 2010

The Death of Champagne Friday (or The Day Neal Lost His Job)

I am not going to go into this too much this morning because:

a) I'm still wrapping my head around it and I should probably not use the "c" word to describe Neal's former employer on a public space. That would probably be immature. And...

2) I wrote a guest blog for Krysten while she's off sunning herself and drinking margaritas by moonlight in Mehico. So, go visit me over there today and then come back tomorrow and hear my rant. I should be dried up and cried out by then.

At Krysten's @ After I Do , I am discussing the pros and cons of marriage...which, now that I think about it, is wildly appropriate, seeing as we seem to be in the throes of the "for worse" part. And while you're over there, give Krysten a follow. Just her posts about hubby Dustin make it worth it. Also? She's blogging with 2 other fellow bloggers on The Wife Diaries, which is amazing just in title alone.

I'll be back tomorrow. More sober and less angry....well, less like The Shining angry and more like P!nk angry. And I'll be looking for a free version of champagne...which could involve a gassy husband in the garden tub.

Monday, January 4, 2010

A Review and a Revelation

And we now return to our regularly scheduled book review....

At the insistence of Queen Elizabeth and Princess Natasha, I ordered this book from Paperbackswap.com (which is such a fantastic deal...you post 7 books you don't mind to ship off - I posted mainly trashy romance novels from my horny college years and a couple of textbooks that those asshats at Kennedy Bookstore wouldn't buy back...and then you instantly get 3 credits to order books from the site. For free. The catch? If someone wants your slut novel or Biochem 102 doorstop, you have to mail it to them at your expense. But you send it media mail so it's never more than a couple of bucks, even though it's essentially shipped by horse. Read: do NOT wait until 2 weeks before the book club meeting to order your book...unless you're nostalgic for Biochem all-nighters. For each requested and sent book, you get another credit! Until you're giving them away in exchange for homemade cookies and tickets to the dollar movies).

Anyway, knowing my penchant for all things masked and caped, they simply insisted that I read book 1 of this Lauren Willig series. And I LOVED it. It's part historical fiction, part chick lit...which is so far up my alley, it's slightly uncomfortable. Admittedly, I did have moments of "Hey, I've read this...it was called The Princess Bride"...but the characters are so charming and the sex scenes are so cheesy (it's been a long time since I've read the word "shaft" and it wasn't referring to a hair follicle) that you tend to forgive the redundancy. Or I did. I think if you're a stickler for historical accuracy or thought-invoking dialogue then you will read this and toss it in the pile marked "crap I read while wasting hours I will never get back." But if you liked The Princess Bride, then you'll love Pink Carnation. It's got all of the wit, masked men, and chivalry of Bride, plus strong female characters and a slice of Napoleonic history (minus Fred Savage in his awkward years).

I am now waiting for the 2nd book in the series to arrive...The Masque of the Black Tulip. If you would like to read book 1, let me know and we can work out a trade (as long as you don't try to pawn something God-awful off on me like The Lost Symbol or anything by Joel Osteen).

If you would like to read a more informed, less random review of this book, check out Fyrefly's Book Blog. But I warn you...I don't think Fyrefly has ever fallen prey to the charms of caped crusaders crying out "Asss youuuuu wisshhhhh" as they tumble down a ravine. It is a helluva book review blog, though.

And now...the revelation....

Setting: Our living room, over a dinner of shrimp/mushroom/tomato/mexican cheese pizza (we call this "clean-out the fridge" pizza. It was, shockingly, not that bad.)

Neal: (as he fiddles with remotes) Hey, check it out!
Me: What?
Neal: Look! We can split-screen the TV with the Wii!!
Me: And why is that necessary in life?
Neal: So you can watch football and play Mario Kart at the same time!
Me: I'm not sure if you noticed, but you are the world's worst multi-tasker. I have to say your name before I start a conversation. You can't even listen to me and surf the internet at the same time. Besides, 25 inches of football and 25 inches of Mario Kart? ADD much?
Neal: This could be great!
Me: That's what they said about Tang.

At least our Prius won't let you watch football on the GPS screen. Yet.