Saturday, October 9, 2010

Taking Inventory...a Couple of Years After the Fact

It's an azure, cloudless day with temps topping out around 80. A perfect day for betting at Keeneland (which just opened yesterday. There is very little that I love more than opening weekend at the horse races...) or tailgating at the UK vs. Auburn game (yes, we will get our asses handed to us in our helmets, but whatever. Defeat is best served with a keg of Miller Light...), or checking out the World Equestrian Games that end this weekend. But I'm camped out in my courtyard, covertly watching the neighbors and their 3 daughters from Alabama unload everything that you move from house to house. It's a voyeur's game...peeking out from Audrey Hepburn sunglasses to see what bedding they brought or how much you can actually squeeze into the trunk of an Infiniti. But, it's Saturday afternoon and I'm also catching up on blogs. This is the perfect place to be.

And while getting caught up on all things blog, I ran across Shana @ Fumbling Towards Normalcy's post, "I'm older than 30, but..." Glamour published an article ages ago about everything a girl should have before she's 30. Since Shana and Krysten @ After I Do have been taking stock this weekend, I think I will, too. Somehow, not accomplishing an item on a beauty magazine's list of what I should have accomplished by the age of 30 goes down better on a sunny, temperate day.

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you've come.
I actually have this one in spades...and by "spades" I mean ex-fiances. I have an ex-fiance who, I think, could have worked out if we had been older when we met. I also have several who remind me that I'm not a punching bag or a back-up plan or the other woman. I am actually more grateful for painful as the entire experience was.

2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone in your family.
The only decent furniture I have ever purchased myself was a bed when I moved to Arizona, and really, it was not that decent according to normal people's standards. It was the mattress, box springs and frame for a twin bed. Hardly luxurious. As a married woman, we have purchased loads of beautiful and expensive furniture (thankyouverymuch, Operation Iraqi Freedom) and now, family heirlooms are actually in the minority.

3. Something perfect to wear if the employer/man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.
Unfortunately, my body is clinging to those last 20 pounds like Bret Michaels is clinging to his last last last 15 minutes of fame. So, I don't have either of these. I have some fantastic jewelry, a couple of pairs of pants that either give me muffin top or camel toe, and a rockin' new haircut. That's what I have right now. Cellulite and highlights.

4. A purse, a suitcase, and an umbrella that you are not ashamed to be seen carrying.
I have all three of these, thanks to our Italian vacation...which required an umbrella and a suitcase and scored me an Italian leather purse. And my PSA for the day: Apparently, you can take a lighter to real Italian leather and it does not scorch, mark, or otherwise destroy your handbag in any way. Also? I will never again buy a suitcase that does not have 360 degree-turning wheels.

5. A youth you're content to move beyond.
Yes, yes, a resounding YES! I was a brat and a bitch.

6. A past juicy enough that you're looking forward to re-telling in your old age.
I think the story of how I met and fell in love with our children's father is as juicy as my past needs to be. Well...that and that one time at band camp. No, seriously...there really was this one time at band camp...

7. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age - and some money set aside to fund it.
How funny that this pops up today, less than 48 hours after a lengthy conversation with my investment broker. One word, boys and girls...Roth. Not as in the David Lee variety. As in the "pay taxes on it now, reap the rewards later" variety. This is not as fully funded as I would like it to be, but as long as the Army keeps us employed, I think we'll be just fine.

8. An email address, a voice mailbox, and a bank account - all of which no one has access to except you.
Check, check, and check. I definitely think a credit card should be added to this list. Have your own credit card. Pay your own credit card with your own bank account...Miss Independent.

9. A resume that is not even the slightest bit padded.
Uh..well, it's not padded...but it's also not growing, either. I mean "starting a business from scratch" is definitely a strong addition. But I'm pretty sure it's more impressive if you show a profit at some point. So, let's say this one is in progress.

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.
I am amazingly blessed with many friends who do both of these exceptionally well. Sometimes, they let me cry and then they make me laugh. Those are the moments that make life so sweet.

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.
While I fully appreciate the need for a woman to have her own tools (which do not necessarily need to be pink. C'mon women, unless it's a Race for the Cure toolkit, we need to man-up a bit), I don't really understand the black lace bra part. Why black? Why lace? Why not something with garters or a Mrs. Claus teddy? At the age of 32, I do not own a black lace bra and I think that is perfectly OK.

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.
I can't think of a single thing I've purchased for myself that was ridiculously expensive. I think if you add up the money I've got invested in my scrapbooks, shoe collection, and hair, that is pretty ridiculous. But I'm OK with that because hell yes, I deserve it.

13. The belief that you deserve it.
I think I covered this in #12. But in case you skipped over it, hell yes I deserve it. I'm a good woman, a good wife, and mostly a good person (snark not withstanding).

14. A skin care regimen, an exercise routine, and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don't get better after 30.
Well, my skin care routine needs a little (or a LOT) of work and I should probably try to drink more water and less mojitos. And I should definitely be fitted for the proper bra. But for the most part, I exercise, I get lots of sleep, and I laugh on the daily. That should take care of most of it.

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship, and all of those other facets of life that do get better.
I have had 32 jobs in 17 years. I love, love, rainbows shooting from my eyeballs LOVE making jewelry and rosaries. I can't imagine doing anything else. I would very much like to think this is the beginning of a beautiful career. And my marriage to Neal is typical and magical, all at once. Satisfying barely scratches the surface.

Thank you so much to Krysten for starting it and Shana for keeping it going. This was not nearly as painful as I thought it must be. Nikes await and my mini-bottles of champagne beckon. Please feel free to play along! We may not be where we thought we would be at the age of 30 (or beyond), but we are where we are and that is the best place we can be!


  1. Have i told you lately that i love you?

  2. Well this was fun to read. I guess I need to go out and buy a black lace bra.....although I seem to have gotten by without one pretty well all these years. :)

  3. Hey pretty pink blog!

    My husband doesn't know many of my passwords, especially to Facebook, etc. I think he know the passwords to our accounts, like DirecTV and such but that's it. However, we have ONE bank account. Honestly, it's so I can keep tabs on the money. We need both our incomes, so we need to be on the same page. Wish it didnt' have to be that way, but that's the way it goes.

  4. You know, I didn't really understand the black lace bra either.

    Cheers to a great week, sister!

  5. Love the pretty new pink! Almost thought I was in the wrong place! :D

    I saw this on Krysten's blog this morning too and was mentally writing a blog as I read. Things like "...thank God I'm not 30, yet..." were dancing through my head. But, I give myself credit for this: It's HARD starting over at 27, really hard when it's from scratch with nothing to your name but a Kitchen Aid mixer and a whole bookcase full of books.

    The rockin' new hair cut... we have pictures, no?

  6. I don't think I'm going to have the satisfying relationship by 30. BUT, I'm more than satisfied with being single right now AND have learned enough to know what I will not be satisfied with. So take that 30 in 6 months!

    I was quite the brat too, but having a dad that spoils you to piss off the step-dad didn't help :)

    Agree on the pics of the hair, please!

  7. So, based on that, I have 5 years to do a lot....oops.

    Head over to my blog because I've given you an award!


  8. Hmmm... I was married at 23 so when I turned 30, I didn't have the old boyfriend but wow, that's powerful now that I'm 40 and have been through a divorce and dating and marriage a second time! You think heartbreak is for nothing but honestly, when you look back, at least you can say you've lived!

  9. A great list!
    And this weather lately has been wonderful, hasn't it?

  10. I have a black bra, though it's not lace. I haven't bought anything ridiculously expensive for myself and I haven't thought about a resume in over 5 years.

  11. Your list rocks, just like YOU!! I love that you love Miller Lite--you know we brew that here in Wisconsin =)

  12. I think the black lace bra is sort of symbolic. I think garters or maribou totally count in it's place. And I love your list-responses! Hope the new neighbors are bearable. ;)

  13. Wow...I'm clearly behind.

    The one thing I have out the wazoo is a collection of respectable purses. I was never the girl getting a Hello, Kitty purse.

    My mom introduced me to the beauty of a well made, versatile purse when I was wee. Since then, I have taken that knowledge and created an outstanding collection.

    All that other shit, though? Yeah, straight hosed.


That's it, let it all out....