Saturday, January 9, 2010

Time for a Toga Party, Stars and Stripes Style

Let me first say that I feel some love up in here. I mean...some LUUUVVVVV!!! Thank you to everyone who shared their thoughts on my Dear Diary moment. We now return to our regularly scheduled Happy Hour.'s here! It's here! It's really, really here! My big sister, AKA Queenie Jeanine, AKA The Other Blonde is being sworn-in on Tuesday. No, she's not being elected to office...we are an honest bunch...we prefer to marry into our money. She's becoming an American Citizen (which is sort of like Citizen Kane, but with a much smaller fireplace and no Rosebud. It's Florida. Sleds are just a pipe dream). How, you ask, does your sister become a citizen of a country to which you already belong? That is such a good question. And one that I can't answer without margaritas, loaded chili fries and Queenie Jeanine's permission. Nonetheless, it's happening this week! I got all of about 36 hours notice from my dad who called to say QJ had received her swearing-in date and he would be pulling out of the driveway at promptly 06hundred Sunday morning. That's 6 AM for everyone who is not a daughter of or married to the Army. Do you know what 06hundred is for me? It's the middle of the night. I only see it when I'm still up from the other side of 06hundred. But tomorrow morning, 06hundred and I are going to share a cup of coffee, a bra and possibly some quality time with the flat iron. We'll see. I asked my Magic 8 app if tomorrow is going to be a ponytail day. It said it is decidedly so.

So, off to the Sunshine State we go. Me, Army Dad, and Suzie Stepmom in the car. For 13 hours. I have 5 hours of The Rachel Maddow Show, 8 hours of The Splendid Table, and another 9 hours of Stuff You Missed in History Class on my iPod. Does this make me a left-winged, foodie and history geek? Possibly. Does it suggest that I'm trying to avoid 13 hours of Army/Computer/Book conversation? Absolutely. And if that fails, I will have New Moon which I haven't started yet, but should finish somewhere around Knoxville...if the sun is up by then. When I'm at my sister's, it's all mojitoes and making jewelry and scrapbooking. There is very little internet time. And she's not wireless. And the family next door that was wireless (in that I'll-share-my-connection-with-anyone-within-range-because-I-like-my-internet-like-I-like-my-STD's: free-and-rampant kind of way) moved. So, now it's just me and my Blackberry. Have you ever blogged on a Blackberry? It's the 8th dimension of Hell. That means I'll see you when I return home (AKA The Frozen Tundra). Until then, here are some pictures to get you in the God Bless America mood:

I have no idea who this guy is on the right, but he's wearing a flag as a toga and that makes me feel very patriotic (I do not want to think about what he did in that flag later, as the vodka flowed and the mean female guests showed off their moves.) That "guy" to the left? Yeah, that's my husband. Yes, he's wearing panty hose. No, he will not guest blog about it. What? You can't really get a good look at him? Let me see if I can help...
All better? If you sit on it, it gets bigger (that's what she said)...
And here's a fun factoid: These pictures were taken at Neal's Officer Basic Course (OBC) about 9 months before he was deployed to Iraq, and about a year before I "met" him. I found the hard copies of these pictures about a month after we got married. In the mix was some of the Armyhookerwhores...damn...female guests posing for the camera. I ran them through the shredder and then mixed it all in with the cat litter. Is that wrong? Well it felt good and you can't take that away from me.

On a different note, I was awarded this:
by Shandal at My Life in 3D. I am supposed to list 10 things that I love which you can view here and give it to 10 other bloggers. It is now 11:40 PM (or 2340) and that means I have 20 minutes to shower, dry my hair, brush my teeth and get in bed so that I can have 6 hours of sleep (I don't even know what I look like on 6 hours of sleep. I am picturing something catastrophic involving a cornea and L'Oreal) . So, if you see your blog in my blogroll, come get ya some of this because I love all of y'all. Like Suzanne Sugarbaker loves a tiara. And go visit Shandal. She'll make you laugh, she'll make you nostalgic, she'll make you almost want to buy P90x. Almost.

Ciao loves! See you after the party!


  1. I have visions of you hiding in the back seat of the car trying not to listen to the conversations in the front whilst secretly taking notes for your blog and wishing it was 18hundred hours.

  2. Awww the award bit is so sweet! :)
    And I have family friends in Miami who just got "sworn in" so I kinda know how all that is. Congrats to Queenie Jeanie!! Enjoy your trip, because I assure you, a trip with a good book or episodes of your favorite shows beats a trip with conversation ANYDAY. I'm the same way. :)
    I'm sorry to hear you were cheated on so many times. It's expected out of you to remain convinced that everyone is like that. The fact that your husband is patient and understanding with you says so much. You know I haven't had a relationship before the one I'm currently in, so I don't have an explanation but I'm generally very paranoid and scared to let people in-so trust me, sometimes I make it too hard on my guy too. You're right on point when you say that once we have everything we wanted, that's when we have something to lose. :/ Anyway, good luck with your relationship. It does take time to reverse it all, but once it happens, there's nothing like it. I'm loads better than how I used to be.

  3. I'm sure Neal is thrilled to make his debut on your page always in some form of uniform or costume. I have to say... I think I prefer the french maid to the dress blues. Those red shoes seriously complete the outfit.

    Congrats to QJ on gaining citizenship! Enjoy your plethora of entertainment! And try not to kill anyone in the car! (please)

  4. Suzanne Sugarbaker! That's awesome!!

    And how long are you going to be gone? Not sure I can handle your absence. Send congrats to QJ!!

  5. Your husband is hot. I just don't know how to feel anymore, I'm so confused...

    Have a faboo trip - can't wait for the deets!

  6. Awesome, LOVE Toga parties :-)


  7. Have a woooonderful trip! I know Rachel kept you entertained for as long as she could in the car. (LOVE her.) And congrats to Queenie Jeanine!!!

    I wish I was in Florida right now. It's 15 degrees here.

    PS your husband has a great rack.

  8. you leave me speechless i laugh so hard. but do get queenie jeanine's permission to tell and tell her i say welcome... again...!!

    ohh annnd shandal already HAS talked me into p90x!

  9. Felicidades to Jeanine and to you, too!

  10. Lol, your post made me feel HYPER! No idea why but it totally did.

    So I assume your sis had to take the citizenship test? Ugh, that was a final for a poli sci class I took in high school and it was HARD. It amazes me the things we Americans have no idea about.

    Have fun in Florida!

  11. "I-like-my-internet-like-I-like-my-STD's: free-and-rampant."

    i have no words. except... awesome.

    have a safe drive and know that i'll be waiting here anxiously (read: jealously) for your return! bring some of that sun with you!

  12. Oh MAN! Super congrats and all that good stuff to QJ! How exciting. And I'm sure you will have loads of fun while you're there... drinking, laughing, scrapbooking, OH MY!

    And Neil in a dress? Very nice! And busty. I like it. My husband is a boob man and I guess it's rubbed off on me. Hmmm. When I typed 'rubbed off' right there, it sounded nasty, but that is NOT the way I meant it. Just sayin.

  13. I don't quite understand it, but congratulations nonetheless! It sounds very exciting.

    I hope all your iPod stories keep you entertained. I also recommend Stephen Colbert's, "I'm America and So Can You!"

  14. hahaha. I havent seen 0600 from the latter side of it since before i left iraq!

  15. Allyson, the award is totally deserved from Shandal. Love that girl.

    Thank you for your beautiful and very honest response on my own blog today. I am so sorry that you went through what you did.

    Girl - update your blogger profile so you have an email associated to your profile so I can respond to your posts through email too. When I click reply - it goes to

  16. Congrats to QJ! Weird fact: I've never been to a toga party.
    Thanks for the shout out! You know you wanna start p90x! ;)

    Oh, and you totally called it, I have been planning my daughter's 1 yr party... TINKERBELL! :)

    Ahem, I agree with Kiran about your email!!!!

  17. oooohhh he sure is puuuuuurrrrrty!!! :) and those shoes are gorgeous! :)
    miss you!

  18. LOL!! Gotta love the party pictures found AFTER the wedding, lol!!!!

    I'm only laughing because I've been there too!!!


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