Roadtrippin' (which is not wordless. At all.)

I sort of dragged in on Monday night, less from the sheer exhaustion of a 5-hour drive and more from the hangover that lasts longer now that I'm pushing 32. But mojitoes were made and had to be drank...and then there were the margaritas. And Carlos. And Carlos making googly eyes at Salt...

Ah..I digress. So, I had every intention of writing this yesterday but as I was driving home from Sam's Club, I started crying through every country song on the radio (yes, even "All My Exes Live in Texas") and then remembered how I had given the stink eye to that lady in the frozen food department and I realized....I have PMS. It's been awhile so I had sort of forgotten how much joy this brings to my life for 5-7 days. I took that as a sign to take to my bed and Facebook stalk under the covers. But now, after several cups of coffee and a handful of macadamia nut Hershey kisses (Brooke, my supply is running low! Darn you, Hawaii, for controlling supply), I am ready to face the world.

Sunday morning came early after a cookout with my Air Force friends on base, but I was eager to reach Savannah where Amanda of It's Blogworthy and her hubs, K, awaited me. Brunch at Goose Feathers was fantastic and I cannot recommend it enough. The line was long but moved swiftly and the owner was actually working the cash register! I am not sure if that speaks to her dedication or her obsession with control, but either way, I was wildly impressed.

Amanda and K are the most adorable couple, him fretting over the space between her babybelly and strangers, and her giggling about his Mama Hen Complex. I could have sat with them for hours, chatting about work, blogging, and travel. K is sort of a diamond in the rough. You know how hard it is to find a man who will have an enjoyable and two-way conversation with you about something other than field goals...kind of like trying to find size 7 thongs in Victoria's Secret. But K does it and does it well. He and Amanda are the perfect compliment to each other. Kind of like us..

Many thanks to K for snapping the photo of us in Ellis Square, Savannah and many thanks to Amanda for unknowingly letting me hijack it from your blog.

I could have stayed until the junk in the trunk went numb from unyielding cafe chairs...but Salt of Salt Says was drinking beer and Mama Salt was pouring mojitos and the first sign of alcoholism is drinking alone with your mom. We couldn't let that happen, could we?

So, it started with a beer on Sullivan's Island:
And then progressed to margaritas at a Mexican restaurant (where I accidentally used my outside voice to order fish tacos. I think I insisted that they be so good they would make me bellow sex noises.)
And then the drunken photography ensued.
But at least there was no drunk Facebooking or drunk texting (this time). Just 2 girls and Mama Salt on the balcony, discussing Prop 8 and where we will all be on Judgment Day (tequila makes me very philosophical).

The next morning was a dehydrated haze of pain, but one latte and an egg/brie sandwich later, we were on the road to normal.
Salt picked up a little Jasper lovin' with her frap and then we hit the bead store, Beaded Venus, which we immediately renamed Bedazzled Penis. I've managed to put up a couple creations from my finds at the bead store, but more are on their way. Glass pumpkin puppy heads anyone?

Finding King Street in downtown Charleston, using only street signs, proved to be a little more dangerous than scavenging bead stores in Mt. Pleasant. Let's just say that Salt has seen the less desirable neighborhoods of Charm City and this area ranked right up there with them. We dialed the Preppy White Girl Look down and the Totally-Fake-Unconcerned-Look up until the windows with bars disappeared and no one would mistake us for Narcs. At this point, there were several hysterical "incidences" and I just don't think I want to squeeze them all into one post. Suffice it to say, those of you who read Salt's blog know that she has completely ridiculous stories and it's tempting to believe they are born in her imagination. I'm here to tell you this crap really happens to her! And to me when I'm with her. So, more later on that. Sorry to be such a flapjacking tease.

Salt covered our trip to the city's creepiest cemeteries in her post today, so I will send you over here to check that out.

And I'm headed out to the rest of you, who I've been neglecting in favor of fruited wine, Budget Travel magazines, and Pat Conroy's latest novel, South of Broad. Love and butt-bumps to Amanda, K, Salt, and Mama Salt for a weekend of buffoonery. Let's do it again, shall we?

Auld Lang Syne

My, my, my...the bloggers that I follow have been a busy bunch these past couple of days. When I took a few days off for Christmas, I came back to see that I only had one post each, if that, to catch up on. I awaken from a Nyquil coma on New Year's Day to find that everyone has been writing, writing, writing! Sheesh! Shouldn't you all be parked at Sonic, ordering double bacon cheeseburgers and chocolate milkshakes and taking 5-hour siestas to make up for the alcohol-persuaded nap of last night? Apparently the draw of packages wrapped in shiny bows are more alluring than blenders of limencello martinis and games of Bandu. So, I shall take a break from your blogging prose (which has kept me from accomplishing anything except a short jaunt to the gym and a lunch of leftover pizza) to give my own summation of the year we just kissed off. And YES, oh faithful ones, Coach is included. Whoah, you all are whores for Coach..but I love it! So without further ado...2009: A Year in Pictures...

This is how January kicked off. It looks like fun...but that's about 2 inches of ice under 2 inches of snow. Cue falling girl in impractical shoes, spinning tires in impractical car, and the sound of cracking...from above. I'll pass, thankyouverymuch.

February: NEAL CAME HOME!! For having the least amount of days, it was the best month all year! And yes, Mommy Dearest actually put this picture of us at the airport on the cake. The picture was taken the day he flew out of Bluegrass Country, headed for Camp Atter-ice for training. The Kentucky Girl in me thinks this cake was a groovy act of celebration...the Chicago girl in me thinks all we needed to complete the look was a double-wide on concrete blocks with a statue of the Virgin Mary in a 1/2 bathtub in the front yard.

March: We attended the Army Chaplains' Strong Bonds retreat for returning soldiers and their spouses. And lucky us! It was held in Hilton Head! So, although it was a whirlwind trip, we did take a couple of hours to hit our favorite spots: Harbour Town, Guiseppe's Pizza and of course Camp Hilton Head. Sidenote: the mysterious disappearance of John and Elizabeth Calvert, owners of the Harbour Town Yacht Basin, and the even more mysterious "suicide" of their accountant rocked the community. The couple was never found but their boat remains moored at Harbour Town, directly behind Neal, actually. And yes, I'm totally a Kardashian.

Oh Keeneland Spring Meet...how we love thee! What a *won*derful way to spend a crisp April day!

Auntie retired in May and we catered...er...caddied...her party. We will caddy any party, as long as an open bar and free food are included. Neal reserves the right to wear a different pair of the 10 plaid pajama bottoms that he owns, though. And yes, both hats are mine. But my shoes are his. We're practically the same person.

This is the only picture I have from my June trip to my sister's in the Sunshine State that does not have the family in it. To protect the identity of Queenie Jeanine (not to be confused with Queenie Jeannie who is not my blood sister, but I deem to be one from another mother anyway) I will post only this. (Although I'm sure none of you are stalkers...but I've seen Dateline...and 20/20..and To Catch a Predator).

Destin in July. No margaritas, only morning sickness. But I did have a great book and GREAT company. Three cheers to the women in my clan. We sure know how to vacation!

August? August was a blur of saltine crackers and ginger ale and crystallized dried ginger and Sprite and white bread. Lots and lots of white bread. Shep was not making life easy but we still managed to take this trip to Philly and Baltimore in early September. Happy 30th to me (yes, again, shut your piehole!) and Happy Anniversary to us. We are so hip...what better way to celebrate than touring every historic ship in the Inner Harbor, feasting at the Reading Terminal Market and getting an all-access pass to the Baltimore Orioles Stadium?? (Not in that order, of course, with the market being in Philly and the other 2 in Baltimore)...

We lost Nolan Shepherd on September 15th and so in October, we went to the Dedication to the Unborn Child, a memorial in my hometown cemetery. When it is completed, there will be a wall of bricks (yep, Shep will have his very own brick) to remember those we lost too soon. Every yin must have a yang so...
Back to Destin for Beach Vacation 09. Less Boost for breakfast, more wine for lunch.

And in the interest of anonymity, this is the only picture from Thanksgiving at Chez Miller that does not show my entire family, engrossed in Wii and slightly intoxicated on the grape. But we bowled and golfed and boxed and played tennis until we were all crippled the next day. Wii: it's not just for tweens anymore...but they do recover a lot faster.

And finally...the one you've all been waiting for...
A girl and her pink Coach fabulousness. And her leopard-print Snuggie. And her pink diamond-encrusted tshirt from Aeropostale. Those eyes are squeezed shut in genuine girl glee. No, it is not the pink patent leather goodness that Coach now offers, but a girl sometimes has to take what she can find at the Silver Sands Outlet (or, more accurately, what Mama Claus is willing to buy from said outlet mall). But it is pink and divine and almost makes me want to trade in all of my purse party D&G knockoffs. Almost.

So, that was a lot of work. And now the girls are walking across my laptop in a defiant act of hunger and there is shrimp to be cooked and mojitos to be drank because..hallelujah...it's only Friday! And I am NOT hungover like everyone else so the thought of alcohol does not repulse me. In fact, I am overdue for a frothy libation!
Happy 2010!
Ally